The man better known as the Gstaad Guy has made a career out of the Internet’s obsession with status, cultural gatekeeping, and plain old wealth. Since 2018, he’s tapped into this seemingly unwavering appetite and fed it back to us in the form of bite-sized do-or-don’t videos. What began as a cheeky impression of a posh friend in the Alps has since evolved into a compulsively hate-watchable persona, complete with alter egos Constance and Colton, a jewelry line, a wine brand, and a millions-strong following that includes the billionaires, royals, and fashion crowd he first parodied.
That same wry charm now fuels his self-titled podcast, where he interviews cultural custodians like Chef Daniel Humm and GQ Editor-in-Chief Will Welch. Like any deep-pocketed jet-setter, the Gstaad Guy is no stranger to the Aspen lifestyle. A series of videos this winter saw him touch down in the “Gstaad of the West,” and he’s back this summer with an exclusive cheat sheet for CULTURED readers. Aspen veterans and ingenues alike are sure to find some fodder for conversation, if not bona fide inspiration, below.
DRESS CODE
Loro Piana linen shirts and “Into the Wild” hiking gear. Understated to most, but a statement to those who know.
A very, very large hat. Aspen ladies fear sun damage.
A Poubel bracelet. Add some fun to an otherwise elegant and understated look. Ideally picked up from Performance Ski in Aspen.
ESSENTIAL ETIQUETTE
Silence. Winter Aspen visitors will practice après-ski screaming and spraying, while summer visitors practice après-hike silence and gratitude. Or at least I hope they do.
No name-dropping. No matter how badly you may want to.
Don’t wear a Kemo Sabe hat if you can’t comfortably trot on a horse.
CONVERSATION STARTERS
“Isn’t summer here just so much better than winter?”
“How many 14ers have you climbed this summer?”
“When are you hiking to Crested Butte?”
“Did you get a table at ArtCrush?”
PLACES TO BE SEEN AT
Aspen Saturday Market
Casa Tua patio for lunch
Cache Cache for dinner
Aspen Music Festival for fine classical music
The new Sant Ambroeus
Madame Ushi
Probably best to avoid Caribou Club
RECOMMENDED MODE OF TRANSPORTATION
E-bike, of course.
REQUIRED READING
Just Good Manners: A Quintessential Guide to Courtesy, Charm, Grace, and Decorum by William Hanson. Everyone in Aspen should be reading this.
EXERCISE REGIMEN
Early morning Pilates or yoga
Mid-morning ride up the Bells and Castle Creek
Lunch: to yap, not to eat
An afternoon hike up the Ute if you are soft, and all the way to the top of Aspen if you know what you’re doing
Pickleball at Maroon Creek Club
Afternoon sauna and cold plunge at North Star Preserve
Evening meditation before a soirée and a dinner at someone’s home
DIETARY RESTRICTIONS TO ABIDE BY
A delicate balance of Aspen tap water and Matsuhisa sushi is ideal.
Most people in Aspen don’t eat and microdose Ozempic instead. Don’t be like them.
in your life?
